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How to Enjoy the North American Veterinary Community Conference

Posted by Tom Lombardo | Fri, Dec 19, 2014 @ 07:00 AM

North American Veterinary Community Conference

Clearly, the best way to plan your trip to the North American Veterinary Community annual conference in Orlando, Florida this January 17-21 is to think of it as a film festival.

The conference is so packed with celebrated speakers and up to 1,200 CE credits that it would make sense for some practices to shut down for a long weekend so every veterinarian could attend.

But since we’re a payment processing company with specialized bundles for your practice, and since our Petaluma, California customer service lines are open 24/7/365, only one of us might get to go.

If it’s me, here’s what I’ll be watching, with select quotes from the online catalog:

Start with the Genera Films

itching catTo get into the swing of things I’ll start with stuff that I’m pretty sure I can understand:

Itchy Cats: Evidence-based Diagnosis and Treatment, Directed by Karen Moriello
“Gripping thriller with incredible plot twists. Will Princess (played by Moriello’s Ragdoll) find a way to scratch the top of her own head in time to chase her nemesis Sammy (Main Coon) from the birdbath?”

Inter-Dog Aggression: An Inconvenient Truth - Not All Dogs Like All Other Dogs, Directed by Terry M. Curtis
“One of those films that builds like a relentless drum roll until it hits its mind-blowing climax. Everybody loves the dog park alpha male Rufus (Connecticut Spaniel) until the dark and mysterious Lady (Malamute) refuses to sniff his butt.”

Oops!: What Happens When You Leave Your Turtles in the Sun Too Long, Directed by Leigh Clayton
“Hilarious frat-house romp where Flash (Central American Wood) insists upon getting a tan to impress his hot new tank-mate Dash (Cherry Head Red Foot).”

Canine Separation Anxiety: I Thought You Were NEVER Coming Home!, Directed by Laurie Bergma
“Rarely does a romantic comedy move the audience as deeply as does Missy (Golden Retriever) in the climactic scenes of this light but earnest  true-love story.”

Move on to the Heady Documentaries

Now that I’m primed up I’m ready for a few challenges:

Anal Sacculectomy: Finally, a Technique That I Can Do, Directed by Howard Seim
“While the title should read ‘a technique that HE can do,’ the cinematography alone is worth the price of admission.”

Onco Surgery Tips: Lump- and Bump-ology, Directed by Sarah Boston
[Editor’s Note: Upon further research we discovered that this film is actually not about twerking.]

Catch the Foreign Films Before Your Eyes Get Blurry

foxLike most people I enjoy watching and listening to films more than reading them, but since I want to keep track of what the rest of the world thinks I would check out these while I can still see clearly:

The Fast and the Furriest: Wild Small Mammal Medicine, Directed by Heather Barron
“If the opening scenes of GoPro-equipped squirrels, foxes, raccoons, and skunks racing through their native habitats don’t captivate you, the tantalizing ‘hidden camera’ views of a possible Ewok colony will keep you bolted to your seat until the last frame.”

Exotic Nursing - What You Can Do When Things Go Wrong, Directed by Lorelei Tibbetts
“A pumping action film starring Kitten (Silverback Gorilla) and Destiny (Bonobo in a breakthrough role) swinging through a globe-trotting series of stunning canopies where they confront thuggish clan lords and attempt to deliver their long-forgotten but incredibly potent medicines.”

Now It’s Time for the Idealistic Documentaries

Dreamers flock to film festivals and that’s one thing I’m looking forward to at this convention. Imagine if we lived in a world like this:

Keeping Your Gecko on the Surgery Table: Proper Anesthesia and Analgesia for Reptiles, Directed by Ryan DeVoe & Michelle Hawkins
“Anyone who saw DeVoe & Hawkins 2006 classic, Getting Your Cat into a Box knows that few vets can position their patients as can these two impresarios. Generous to a fault and revealing everything they know, we’re still left dumbfounded.”

How YOU Can Treat ANY Behavior Problem, Directed by Laurie Bergman
“Destined to be one of the seminal films inaugurating the twenty-first century mind-set, Bergman begins with simple obsessive-compulsive chewing and somehow draws us to a glorious and hopeful vision of humanity’s future. Her Great-Great Uncle Ingmar would be very proud.”

Stay in the Dream by Watching Art Films Next

As any film festival lover will tell you, art films are hit-and-miss, and your reaction often depends more upon your mood than the content of the film itself. I think these stories have the best chance of building on the good vibe from the idealistic documentaries:

parrotShampoo Therapy, Directed by Paul Bloom
“Suggestive in unexpected ways, this day-in-the-life panorama of Upper East Side New York would make a beautiful statement extolling the virtues of luxury even without the luscious voice-overs of Tutu (Havanese), whose travails with her fur become analogous to civilized humanity’s struggle to find its place in nature.”

Surgery of the Parrot Head, Directed by Scott Echols & Brian Speer
“Apparently isolated in an eerie tree where other birds and even branches seem to appear and disappear according to some supernatural logic, Percy (Hyacinthine Macaw in a remarkably subtle performance) tries to convince his caring but over-protective friend Rummy (Mantled Howler) that since nuts exist, the universe must have purpose.”

Take Some Time Off with Horror

True, there’s still a little more work to be done, but no one can keep their nose to the millstone all the time. And what better way to stop thinking than to start watching horror? These seem like likely hits:

The Vomiting Cat, Directed by Todd R. Tams
“One of those rare instances when gross-out spew manages to be a great date movie!”

Bite Wounds, Directed by Kristy Broaddus
“You will never forget the opening scene, and no matter how badly you want to you won’t tear your eyes away until Broaddus masterfully unleashes a climax that will leave you stunned!”

Prepare To Talk to the Director

There’s one film I really want to attend because I know I have something to contribute if Director Darren Osborne holds a Q&A afterwards: Creating Practice Revenue by Helping Pet Owners Say “Yes” to Treatment.

My company provides veterinarians a suite of products that helps them do exactly that, and we have reason to believe that our services have a positive impact on our veterinarians’ ability to provide affordable treatment. Here’s a short film about them:

Bring Back What They Want

As anyone who’s been to a conference knows, the people at work who don’t get to go want to share the experience. So naturally if my company decides to send me, they’ll have some say over what I watch.

In fact, they’ve already told me that if I go I’m required to record – and to study extensively – Director Karyn Gavzer’s Blooper Recovery: Tips for Awkward Moments.

hold check, multiple check

Topics: Veterinarians, Events / Conferences

Written by Tom Lombardo